On November 27th 2016 while watching the boob tube, La Virgen de Guadalupe came into my mind’s eye: My Chawa’s (grandmother’s) favorite saint so of course I got up to get my paper and pencils to draw her…for her. Friday night December 9th, 12 days later I was hit with the most hilarious memory that her and I had shared many years ago. I thought to myself and mentioned to my husband and sis that we needed to go visit her. I wanted to remind her of all the funny things she did when we were little. She was always getting herself into trouble. Kinda like a Mexican version of (I Love) Lucy! I also wanted to see if she remembered this specific memory and if she would laugh as hard as she had when it happened.
Saturday came and went and Sunday got busy too. I “thought” I’ll go see her on Monday. Not even the flock of crows that filled up the sky above my home that Sunday afternoon, signaling for me that a death was near, could make it click for me. I mean, when I saw them I felt it. I knew a death was near…but I didn’t ask about it. Instead I pushed this information/message away. I tried my best to ignore it…because (like many of us) I don’t like the feeling of death. The feeling that those we love won’t be living life with us anymore.
Monday morning December 12th 2016, I was woken up by two brown eyes coming toward me…they came in so close to my face that I even made the motion of swatting them away from my face! That was something I had never experienced before. Usually I am woken up by beautiful light that form into those in spirit or random words/concepts…but never eye balls! I mentioned this eyeball incident to my husband as he left for work…(poor guy – he had no idea what he was getting into when he married me) LOL.
Shortly after getting to work, I get “the call”…grandma isn’t doing too well today…they put her on oxygen to help her breathe. That’s when it all started clicking. I cancelled all my meetings for the day and off I went to go see her. On the way to pick up my sister, I text my mom to see if she needed me to pick up anything on my way in. She said her phone was dying and needed a charger for a galaxy phone.
Ironically I had recently placed an order for iPhone chargers for my family and “accidentally” ordered galaxy phone chargers, which were not refundable (annoying at the time) so I still had them at home. Perfect…I could stop at home, picked up the charger and print a copy of the drawing of La Virgen of Guadalupe for my Chawa.
When we got there, she was in worse shape than I’d ever seen her. We spoke to her in her ear, letting her know we were there. I showed her the picture of her favorite saint…holding it before her eyes, silently asked ever single angel, spirit guide, archangel, ascended master I have ever worked with…and of course La Virgen de Guadalupe to assist my Chawa as she let go of her human form.
My sister and I held her hand as she took her last breaths and left the body. It was profoundly beautiful and peaceful. and for me…this experience, even though it fills me with deep sadness, was a sacred honor. I can say it in no other way…
I am more convinced now than ever before that Life Itself is Divinity aka God and everything that happens within it is happening for us. We need to remember this and have no fear as we go about the business of living. We need to trust that there is a reason Life unfolds before us as it does. There are no accidents or mistakes. Life (The Divine) is constantly…continually trying to help us. We need only to be present and do what feels right now. When we do, we don’t miss opportunities to share the sacredness of living with the people we love.
Ugh…In tears again! But, that last little bit of information is the point of sharing this little episode of my life with you. It is also to document and honor this episode.
Rest in Peace Chawa